It was kind of funny how it all happened and I would learn things after it all happened that I had been too blind to see. It all started with an email my biological "mother" sent me about this "friend" that she had made. This "friends" name was Julie Lafferty (or JL as she's know at the ATO). JL turned out to be younger than me so my first thoughts were that she was trying to take away my "mother", a "mother" that I had suffered for, had broken hearts over, and cried on more than once occasion. My "mother" assured me that those were not Julie's intentions and that should have clued me in, but I didn't believe her.

Ruby, my "mother" told me over and over that her relationship with Julie was not that type of relationship and that they were very close friends. I wouldn't know just how close until a few weeks later. Ruby and I talked on MSN messenger and she told me that she was thinking about leaving my dad, seriously considering it so I asked her where she planned to go. I assumed she would come here. She said no that she wouldn't come here because that would be placing me in the middle. I knew immediately that it was a lie and only a means for her to excuse where she going to go to herself. I told her that if she went to Julie instead of me, that I would never speak to her again.

So she sends me this email and tells me that if I was going to back her in to a corner that would basically have no choice but to choose Julie so that I needed to rethink my opinion. I sent an email back and told her that if she didn't like being backed into a corner why in the heck was she backing me in to one? She said that Julie was in her life to stay and if I couldn't accept that, there's the door don't let it hit you in the ass on your way out (so to speak)

I didn't speak to her again after that. My sister called me a few days later and told me that Ruby had left and had taken my Dad's new truck with her, the same truck that he was making $400.00 a month payments on. My dad works hard for what he has, he always has and he never really had alot of money to play with so to get into payments of this amount was hard for him to begin with. Ruby talked him into it and then ran off the vehicle that she wasn't even paying for. Then to top it all off, my sister tells me that she ran off with Julie and that they were lesbians. I about fell over in my chair. I said WHAT? No way! So between her and my brother they sent me the cached text chats that the two of them had been having and I had to close my eyes throughout most of it, it was that sick. I would tell Damon to keep scrolling until there was something that I could read, turns out there wasn't much I could read except hello.

I was shocked, horrified, disgusted and angry. It wasn't until later on that night that the hurt set in. This woman who had called herself my "mother", who'd swore that she'd never leave me again, who tried so many times to place herself above my mom and my husband's mom, had left me again. Not for the first time, but for the second and in my book, the very last.

She tried so hard to make me believe that she was better than mom, better than Damon's mom, because she needed to believe that herself. The fact of the matter is, she's trash, exactly what my mom told me she was in the beginning.

I think back to how much pain I caused my mom in the decisions that I'd made, things that I'd said and done by protecting Ruby, this "mother" and I cringe. The true mother, the true mom is the one that stands beside their child no matter what, I have two of those, I have my mother, my mom who raised me (just because you give birth to a child does NOT make you a mother, Ruby is proof of that), and I have Carol, my husband's mom, who has been there for me so many times over the years, she is my second mother. The woman who gave birth to me is ..... nothing.

Am I still angry? Hell yes I am and not just for myself, but for my children and for the rest of my family. I would learn that when Ruby and my dad would visit, she would leave here and go talk about how horrible my children were, say horrible things about me, about my husband. On the same token, when she'd talk to me she'd say horrible things about my sister, she kept a conflict going between me and my sister for years so that we wouldn't talk. She kept me away from my father by telling me that he had said horrible things about my husband. She knew from the beginning, in the very beginning I told her that if she ever put me in a position where I had to choose between her and my husband, that she'd loose, that I'd choose my husband. She knew that and she used that, but she it against my own father. How low can a person sink? I think I know now because Ruby sank below that.

I would also learn after she left that she abused my oldest daughter. My daughter didn't tell me until after she knew that Ruby was out of the picture for good. Ruby would also go on to tell anyone that would listen that my father "raped" her, even though by her own account, she'd been sleeping on the couch for months, which of course was because she was sleeping with her lesbian lover and didn't want to cheat. On top of everything else, she has the nerve to say that she's not a lesbian and then tries to blame the entire event, her whole life's misery on my baby sister. It was all "her" fault, not Ruby's fault, but the baby of the family's fault. What a sick woman.